


Two Arms to Hold Him

by Amledo



Series: Asexuality and Platonic Romances [4]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel (Movies), Marvel Avengers Movies Universe, The Avengers (2012), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship, Asexuality, Cuddling & Snuggling, Cute, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Platonic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-15
Updated: 2012-10-15
Packaged: 2017-11-16 09:36:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/538058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amledo/pseuds/Amledo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony Stark isn't the playboy that he wants the world to believe he is. He hasn't actually taken anyone to bed with him in a very long time, it simply isn't for him. What he wants is what Thor and Loki have, a platonic romance. But his heart has chosen Steve Rogers and he doesn't think he has a chance. Straight!Thor/Asexual!Loki Straight!Steve/Asexual!Tony fluff and a bad word</p>
            </blockquote>





	Two Arms to Hold Him

The Avengers—the name had stuck and all discussion about changing it was long abandoned—had been three weeks without any sort of incident, and it was beginning to show in very telling ways. The stress of being cooped up, even with a gloriously modern lab at his disposal, had sent Dr. Banner away on a camping trip somewhere in Canada. Tony expected that he would never see that particular helicopter again and that the Doctor would be barefoot when he returned.

Natasha and Clint were restless; all of their normal espionage missions had been cancelled in favor of their being on standby to respond to a situation. In protest they had taken over the lower levels, everything below the lab and above the garage, for some strange war game. Occasionally JARVIS would inform Tony that there had been yet another fire or that a number of windows had been broken, and Tony would add it to the list. There was no way that he was going down there or sending innocent repairmen into hostile territory.

Tony himself was flat out of ideas, for anything and everything. It was so disconcerting that he was purposely avoiding his lab out of some strange sense of shame. Part of him attributed it to Bruce no longer being there to bounce ideas off of, but most of him knew that he had hit a funk. It was difficult to accept that. He was sleeping normally for the first time in a very long time. It had taken him days to get Pepper to relax and to see that it might be good for him and that she should stop consulting every Doctor in a six state radius.

More concerning was that Steve had felt no compulsion to call a meeting of any sort. He was spending the same amount of time in the gym, that was true, but the rest of his free time was occupied by sketches rather than battle plans. Tony had been trying to sneak a peek at the sketch pad for the longest time, but was so off his game that Steve either caught him or was able to hide it effectively enough that the billionaire had given up.

Loud, boisterous, energetic Thor was no longer bouncing off the walls demanding an enemy to smite or a foe to fell. The God had instead taken to cooking all of their meals, to which even Clint and Natasha had started showing up. Thor was definitely a wonderful cook. He also spent a good deal of time touring local wineries and breweries and distilleries, Tony had given him a Stark Industries credit card. The building was never short on any of the finest booze, which was good, because it took a hell of a lot to get to Thor and even more to get to Steve. And it only got to Steve if he took a pill that Tony had designed that temporarily lowered his metabolism.

Then there was the reason for their current dry spell. Loki, Thor's dark haired brother with a mischievous streak a mile wide, had returned to Earth after serving out his punishment in Asgard. He had come seeking forgiveness for his misdeeds and the Avengers were perfectly willing to grant it. But to ensure that there were no hard feelings and to prove that he was in their court, he had personally threatened all of the known hostile forces in the galaxy.

The Avengers wished that Loki wasn't quite such a terrifying bastard. It had worked.

So there they were, in Avengers tower, four super heroes, and they were having a movie night. Thor and Steve had been the driving force behind the idea and Loki had agreed instantly, Tony had simply nodded, what else was he going to do? None of them had had the guts to interrupt the game being played elsewhere.

Though they had enough couches that everyone could have their own perch, a measure Tony had implemented after only a week of living at the tower with people who bickered like children, that day they chose to double up. Thor and Loki dominated a fairly large couch what with all their long limbs and Thor's undeniable bulkiness. It was understandable that they shared; Loki seemed to have trouble being very far from his brother, which left Tony wondering what that punishment had been. That and the pair of brothers had developed a very close relationship in the past weeks, one that no one questioned and few understood.

Tony was sharing with Steve, both on opposite ends of the couch, bowl of popcorn settled between them. Tony sat with his bare feet tucked up under himself and Steve had mimicked that position, though with his long legs it was easier to let them rest to the side.

Half-way through the first movie Tony noticed that Loki had pillowed himself on Thor's chest and that both Gods were stretched out, long legs making their toes brush against the arm rest on the opposite end of the couch. Loki had settled between Thor's legs and the blonde had looped his arms protectively around the brunette's waist. It looked like the most comfortable sitting position in the world. Tony smiled slightly at the fact that Loki's magic was being used to levitate the bowl of popcorn beside them for easy access.

Thor whispered something into Loki's ear while pointing at the screen. Tony didn't even remember what movie they were watching at that point. Laughing softly Loki twined his fingers with Thor's and the larger God just shook his head, kissing Loki's hair affectionately.

Tony sighed lightly, his chest aching—which for once he didn't attribute to the Arc Reactor—the desire that he had repressed for years was eating away at him. He had spent the better part of his adult life paying people off to say that he had slept with him, sometimes even to go as far as filing a paternity suit. It was easier than admitting to the public that he wasn't the playboy they all expected him to be.

It was so much more difficult than he expected anyone to be able to understand. And so he spent much of his time lonely, feeling deprived of the one thing that he needed. He wanted desperately for someone to hold him and to leave it at that. He wanted a heart to beat beside his own and a body to keep warm with. He wanted to be loved and to feel a sense of romance, but he did not want the sex that came with it. He didn't even truly want to be kissed on the lips. In truth, he hadn't wanted sex even when he was having it. Three psychologists were now living very comfortable retired lifestyles because they had finally helped him to understand himself. But asexuality was something that he struggled with. He had told no one except Pepper.

"Tony, are you alright? I'm going to go make more popcorn," Steve's voice was a whisper and Tony was very proud that he managed not to jump out of his skin. He tore his eyes away from the pair of Gods, feeling guilty that he had been so lost in staring.

"Yeah, I think I will come with you, maybe get a drink," Tony breathed in response and followed Steve to the kitchen.

Once in the bright light of their professionally equipped kitchen—where Tony had been required to move his bar—he scrubbed at his face and let out a small sigh. He really had been trying to avoid watching the pair of brothers. Their relationship mimicked exactly what he was looking for in his own life. They were content to love each other in an almost purely emotional sense. When he had asked them, they had explained that such a thing was common on Asgard; Thor was a straight man and was never going to be anything else. But Loki, though having had a wife once, had never had any desire for anyone. As such they had allowed themselves to be one another's comfort and had fallen into some strange semblance of love.

"You really are miles away. Are you sick Tony?" Steve's warm hand was resting against Tony's forehead and Tony blushed because he couldn't keep himself from leaning into it. The blonde cocked his head slightly before brushing his fingers over Tony's cheeks, eliciting the same uncontrollable response.

"I think some days that I truly am sick Steve," Tony responded, leaning heavily against the bar had silently hoping that Steve's hand would stay put just a moment longer. Steve was the one that Tony's heart had chosen, and it was crushing Tony to not be able to say something. He was terrified that if he admitted it then he would go from not being able to touch Steve to not being able to see Steve.

"Why would you say that about yourself?" Steve asked, having picked up on the alternate meaning of the word 'sick' and hating the sound of it. He gently cradled Tony's face, trying to get his teammate to open up to him. Tony drew a ragged breath, tears sparkling in his eyes as he wrapped his arms around Steve and buried his face in the blonde's neck. The response from Steve made Tony cry even harder because those strong arms wrapping around him were all that he had dreamed about for months.

"Because I love you and I can't even do it properly because I'm fucking broken," Tony whispered and Steve didn't pull back, he just held Tony tighter.

"Tony what do you mean?" Steve asked, not knowing what else to do with the crying billionaire. It hurt him badly to see the other man like that.

"I'm in love with you. I fell in love with you. But…Steve…it's horribly complicated. Oh God. I know you aren't gay, but neither am I and it's just…" Tony pressed his face into Steve's neck and closed his eyes tightly against the tears.

"Oh, Tony…shush, you're alright. I should have understood what you meant. Pepper told me about this back when she thought that she was going to be leaving for all that time. She said that I would need to know in order to take care of you. God I'm an idiot to think that she would have been joking," Steve carded his fingers through Tony's hair and held the smaller man a little more tightly. "Don't worry Tony, I need someone to hold onto as well," Steve whispered gently, fingers carefully rubbing at Tony's scalp. The billionaire granted him a watery smile when he pulled back.

"You don't have to humor me Steve, really it's alright," Tony whispered, wiping his face with his hands. Steve shook his head and helped the tear cleanup process.

"It isn't that Tony. I care about you a lot. More than I should. And yeah I'm straight, but that doesn't mean it's a chore for me to hold you. There's a certain kind of love that I'm never going to experience again, and I don't want to, there will only ever be the one girl. But there's a difference with you, I can hold onto you all I want and you won't ever expect more than I can give. I can love you like that Tony Stark, if you let me," Steve said firmly. He still loved Peggy, would always miss her and would never betray her memory by finding someone to just fall into bed with. She had taken a piece of his heart with her and it was gone forever. But he did not feel ashamed to give Tony what was left of it.

Steve carefully kissed the top of Tony's head and rubbed the other man's arms, slowly bringing him to a calmer state of mind. Tony was rarely emotional, but when he was it was bad and so the Captain was glad to help in any way that he could.

"Thanks Steve…I…it feels like a dream to hear you say that," Tony muttered with a weak smile. Steve just smiled in response and grabbed their cooling popcorn out of the microwave. He poured it into the bowl and tossed away the bag. On the way out he carried the bowl in one hand and clasped the other with Tony's. Few things in his life had ever felt quite so right.


End file.
